Would you date someone who doesn't have a job? Many of us would at least think twice about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah....we hear all the comments about love conquering all, and the fact that our relationships shouldn't have anything to do with money. But we all know that's a bunch of BS.
The truth is that money does matter. There are deep biological reasons that men with more financial resources are more attractive. To some extent, the same is true for men evaluating women, but the dynamics can be different. Self-preservation is the rule of the day, and most of us do not want to mate with individuals who challenge our ability to survive and prosper.
The recession has certainly impacted relationships, as tough economic times make marriages more volatile. What is most ironic, however is that the need to stay together may be greater when the family doesn't have as much money as it would like to have. In other words, the relationship gets worse, but staying in the relationship becomes a greater necessity for survival.
But here's another question:
What if you are in a good relationship with someone and they are suddenly laid off from their job? An even greater question is whether or not men and women have the same reaction. Some argue that if a man is laid off, his status in the relationship is in big trouble. But this can be true for women as well.
Interviewing 101
Be on time!
Always show up 15 to 20 minutes prior to your appointment. You are guaranteed not to get the job if you're late for the interview.
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Check Your Cell:
Turn off your cell phone, and take that #!!>%! Bluetooth out of your ear. 'Nuff said.
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Look and dress the part: Men
The first thing your potential employer will notice is how you look. Men should always wear a navy or grey traditional suit, white or light blue dress shirt, power tie, and business shoes. Jewelry, aftershave lotion and cologne are big NO NOs.
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Look and dress the part: Women
Women should also wear a suit, with closed toe shoes. NEVER wear an abundance of make-up, keep your jewelry to a minimum and ladies please wear stockings with your skirt. It's usually a safe bet to always look conservative...maybe except in the music industry...or construction....
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Get to the point:
Answer questions straight on. Going off on a tangent will put the interviewer to sleep. Sleep + candidate = "We're going have to pass."
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Past employers:
Never speak negatively about a previous employer, because you never know who knows whom. If the employer asks "Why do you want to leave your current job?" the best answer is "I had a great professional relationship with my colleagues and managers, I've gained a tremendous amount of experience, but in order for me to continue my growth career wise, it is time for me to move on."
Research, Research, Research:
Know who you're interviewing with. Going into an interview with zero knowledge of what the company does is the equivalent to diving into water without knowing how deep it is.
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Money Hungry Will Leave You Starving:
Don't overprice yourself out of a job, especially if you're unemployed. If you are unemployed always give a range -- your minimum should be no more than $2K-$3K higher than your previous salary.
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Never Let 'Em See You Sweat:
Be confident, but not arrogant. Be enthusiastic, but not desperate. The company should be so lucky to get such a great candidate! Good luck!
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In the interview below, I speak with Tuwana, a woman in the midwest who lost her job during the current recession. She is on the dating scene right now, and shares the ups and downs of her experience with AOL Black Voices. Click below to listen!
Dr. Boyce Watkins is a Finance Professor at Syracuse University and author of "Financial Lovemaking 101: Merging Assets with Your Partner in Ways that Feel Good." To have Dr. Boyce commentary delivered directly to your email, please click here.



Comments: (31)
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By: Krystal L on 9/14/2009 11:33PM
I think there is no right/wrong answer here. I think whether or not someone should date someone who's been laid off would be determined by many factors, other than the straight fact that they've been laid off. These are the questions to ask before making that decision:
1. Were you two together BEFORE they got laid off? And if so, how long?
2. WHY did he get laid off? And what are his chances of finding another job as financially stable?
3. How has he applied himself since he got laid off?
4. How dramatically will things change after the lay off?
5. Does he/she have a back-up plan OR another source of income?
6. Will you as his/her partner be able to carry the load or burden of responsibilities and/or still be able to maintain your living style with just your income?
7. How hard is it normally for that person to find a job? (If they've got a great resume with no record, then it might not matter. BUT if that person has a long rap-sheet & just lost the only job that would give them a chance, then that's a different story!)
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