Money Management for Women: How to Be Selfish for the Greater Good

As women, we tackle an incredible amount of responsibilities every day. After juggling our demanding professional and personal roles – as employees or bosses, wives and partners, mothers, sisters, friends or volunteers – we often feel like there's no time for ourselves. Unfortunately, this can be a big mistake when it comes to your personal finances.

Instead of letting a never-ending stream of "things to do" cloud your day-to-day life, take time instead to position yourself and those you love for financial success. One way to do that is to put yourself first financially. Here are some ideas to get started -- especially for those of you who seem to sacrifice everything for others.

RELATIONSHIPS AND MONEY

The relationships we have with various people in our lives can serve to bolster our finances, or deteriorate them if we're not careful. As women, we must first learn to have a healthy relationship with money by ourselves, learning how to manage money properly, avoiding excessive debt, and by shattering the myth that money issues are either "too complicated" or "too boring" for us to handle. Once we start to properly handle our own financial affairs, then we can extend that healthy perspective about finances to how we deal with money when it comes to friends, family and loved ones.

Be Selfish – For the Greater Good

It may sound like an oxymoron, but being "selfish" about your personal finances actually can help you enhance the lives of others. How so? When you are financially secure, you're less stressed, so you can be more patient with the kids, more generous in your economic giving to religious groups or charity, and more productive at work. On the contrary, money problems can dampen all these things. To strengthen your financial standing, try implementing the following tips.

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Fabulous Mocha Moms

Mocha Moms is a great organization for women with children who choose to work part time and/or in the home to be more available to their families. Click to learn more!

Jae C. Hong, AP

BlackVoices.com

Fabulous Mocha Moms

A Mocha Mom on Michelle Obama: "Mocha Moms across the country are thrilled that First Lady Michelle Obama has stated that she will be spending this season of her life as 'Mom-in-Chief.' It in some ways validates the choices our members have made to step away from high-powered careers to devote time to their families."

Fabulous Mocha Moms

Cheli English-Figaro, Esq., Co-Founder and President Emerita of Mocha Moms, says: "When we started this organization in 1997, we knew it would grow. The trend toward women leaving full-time employment had already been established as families across the United States were re-discovering the benefits of having a home-based parent. However, African-American families were not recognized as being part of that trend in large numbers. We knew though, that African-American home-based moms existed and that if we built this organization, they would come. But even with that knowledge, we never anticipated the explosive growth which occurred. We were amazed and completely awestruck by the number of women who wanted to be a part of the organization."

Fabulous Mocha Moms

Mocha Moms Inc. is open to women of all races and ethnicities. Angelina Jolie would make a perfect candidate as a woman with a multicultural family who puts her children and humanitarian activities before her career.

Fabulous Mocha Moms

What is the most positive aspect of being a mother who stays at home, or who has chosen a flexible career to make more time for her family? Cheli says: "I love the flexibility my lifestyle has afforded me. Even though I am employed, and have been since my oldest child (who is now 15) was less than two years old, I have chosen jobs that allow me the flexibility to work around my children's schedules... However, every woman's career choice is hers alone to make and only she knows what is right for her family. Further, many Mocha Moms are employed either part-time, flex-time or even full-time -- inside and outside the home."

Fabulous Mocha Moms

Cheli with her family. The Mocha Moms National platform includes: "A strong commitment to marriage and to the support of our husbands: Mocha Moms, Inc. is committed to supporting the at-home mother of color as she sets the foundation for her family and learns and grows as a wife and/or partner."

Fabulous Mocha Moms

A Mocha Moms Life Management Tip: "The best way to maintain an organized and efficient household while still having time to have fun with you husband, children and friends is to create a system or routine that works for you. I don't know too many moms who are incredibly enthusiastic and joyful about doing a mountain of laundry every Thursday, but the organization helps get those types of projects done."

Fabulous Mocha Moms

The Smiths take family life to the red carpet. Here we see Jada with her actor-offspring Willow and Jaden. Jada mixes work, play and personal time, like many Mocha Moms do.

Fabulous Mocha Moms

Mocha Moms founder Cheli English-Figaro, Esq. mentioned Julia Roberts as an exemplar of a successful mother who has made it her choice to focus on family. Here we see Roberts after giving birth to her third child, Henry Daniel Moder, with her two-year-old twins, Hazel Patricia and Phinnaeus Walter.

Fabulous Mocha Moms

A Mocha Moms Money Management Tip: "Take a look at your saver-packs that are mailed home. Even some Web sites offer coupons for your favorite products or stores. Chat up your friendly neighborhood grocer (or clothing store owner) and learn what days (if any) are prime times for sales so you can plan your shopping accordingly."

Fabulous Mocha Moms

Actress Angela Bassett often makes her children Slater Vance and Bronwyn Vance a part of her professional life. Her life as a renowned actress also gives her the personal time she needs to focus on them. Is the Mocha Moms lifestyle for you?

Fabulous Mocha Moms

• Establish a Personal Cash Cushion
Set aside three months worth of expenses to protect yourself and your family in the event of an emergency or some major unexpected expense.

• Avoid Over-Spending On Others
Many of us are guilty of over-indulging our children and other family members with luxuries ranging from expensive clothing to electronic gadgets, or a house full of toys. Over-spending sets you back financially and sends the wrong money messages to those you love most.

• Build Your Own Credit Rating
It's not enough to have joint credit accounts with a spouse. All women need to have credit in their own name, in order to establish a solid credit history and to learn how to manage credit wisely.

• Maintain a Separate Account
Many couples share joint accounts to pay household bills – and that's fine. But having a separate savings or checking account gives you a heightened degree of financial autonomy and helps you become better at saving and budgeting too.

• Learn to Just Say No
Too often, we create financial problems and stresses simply because we are afraid to say "No" -- or don't want to hurt someone's feelings. Summons the courage to say "No" to family members or friends who want to "borrow" money all the time, ask you to co-sign for credit when you know they're irresponsible, or who simply crimp your budget in various ways.

By adopting these strategies, women of all ages, incomes and backgrounds can create a secure, stress-free financial future.

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Lynnette Khalfani-Cox, an award-winning financial news journalist and former Wall Street Journal reporter for CNBC, has also been featured in top newspapers including the Washington Post, USA Today, and the New York Times, as well as magazines ranging from Essence and Redbook to Black Enterprise and Smart Money.