Should You Mix Finance with Romance? And Sign a Prenup?

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If you're madly in love, money should be the last thing on your mind, right? Maybe not. One of the greatest pieces of advice that I learned from reading the book 'Financial Lovemaking 101' is that if you want to talk about love, you've got to talk about money first. Getting rid of your financial anxiety is an important part of trusting your partner.

But, what if your partner asked you to sign a prenuptial agreement? Would you feel that they don't trust you, or would you think they were being prudent? If you were the one who made the most money, would that change your point of view? After Elin Nordegren, the wife of Tiger Woods, asked for $750 million as her divorce settlement, many have reconsidered the value of a prenuptial agreement.


Rather than fearing a prenup, some experts argue that such an agreement can keep your divorce from getting too messy. "They can be a great tool because they force couples to discuss money," says Glinda Bridgforth, author of 'Girl, Get Your Money Straight: A Sister's Guide to Healing Your Bank Account and Funding Your Dreams in 7 Simple Steps.' As the divorce between Tiger and Elin gets messier and messier, the value of their prenuptial agreement might provide some bargaining ground for them to continue negotiations.

Also, Dr. Boyce Watkins, finance professor and author of 'Financial Lovemaking 101,' says that a prenuptial agreement is not a plan for divorce, but is instead an insurance policy to make sure that the divorce happens peacefully (if at all). "The same way the government created financial reform to have an orderly process for dismantling failed banks, a prenup imposes an orderly process for dismantling failed marriages," says Dr. Watkins, who counsels couples on their financial issues. "Going through divorce without a careful plan is like dealing with the pain of death and finding out that no one made arrangements for the funeral."

According to the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology, 50% of all first marriages, 67% of all second marriages and 74% of all third marriages end in divorce. Given that the odds are stacked against us, it might make sense to protect your assets. Whether you believe in prenuptial agreements or not, they are now a more significant part of the emotional conversation.

Would you sign a prenup? Have you signed one already? If your spouse asked you to sign a post-nuptial agreement (like a prenup, but signed after the ceremony), would you? Leave your comments below!

Lawrence Watkins is the Founder of Great Black Speakers. He is also the owner of speakers' bureaus dedicated to Hispanic speakers and Christian motivational speakers. His book, "Frame Your Future: 8 Principles to Effectively Focus on the Future and Not Dwell in the Past", will be released in August 2010. If you would like Lawrence's articles delivered directly to your email, please click here.

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