I've been married for nearly 10 years now. I love my wife like I love oxygen, and couldn't imagine not being married at this stage of my life. There's no person I'd rather be on this journey with, and that's why I popped the question in the first place. In short, I believe in marriage. No, it isn't a perfect institution, and yeah, the man is usually the one taken to the cleaners when things do go south, but few things in life are perfect because life itself isn't. So who better to navigate this imperfect world with than the person you love most? And the kids, well, they're just the proverbial icing on the cake. It's all lovely.
And that's why I found the results of a recently released study sorta disturbing:
A new survey in the United States has revealed that almost four in 10 couples believe that marriage is becoming obsolete. More people are accepting the view that wedding bells aren't needed to have a happy family, reports The Daily Mail.
A poll by the Pew Research Centre in conjunction with Time magazine highlights the rapidly changing notions of the American family. According to their report, nearly one in three American children is living with a parent who is divorced, separated, or never married - a five-fold increase from 1960...
About 39% of Americans said marriage was becoming obsolete. That sentiment follows US census data that showed marriages hit an all-time low of 52% for adults 18 and over. In 1978, just 28% believed marriage was becoming obsolete.
Sadly, it might be the bad economy leading people to see marriage as going the way of the rotary phone. The statistics do paint an unromantic picture: "The US Census Bureau recently reported that opposite-sex unmarried couples living together jumped 13 per cent this year to 7.5 million. It was a sharp one-year increase that analysts largely attributed to people unwilling to make long-term marriage commitments in the face of persistent unemployment." It would be a crying shame if more and more people were opting out of one of the most fulfilling aspects of life because they don't have a steady paycheck -- or know when they will next receive one.
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We already know that this recession is having a devastating psychological impact on millions. Who knew that it could also erode the traditional fabric of the American family? Who knows -- maybe future families will take new forms. But it's clear that this recession is changing the shape of society in deeper ways than we realize.
Jay Anderson is a freelance writer from Washington, DC, whose work has been featured in the Washington Post and on NPR. When he's not busy talking smack here, he runs the award-winning blog AverageBro.com. Follow him via Twitter @AverageBro.


Comments: (23)
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By: nomoxcuses on 11/19/2010 6:11PM
Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, blah! The only thing that is becoming "obsolete" is the Americas-as we know it-belief and understanding in God!
Welcome to the wonderful world of flesh! I don't know where these so called "polls" come from but no one ever asks me anything-it's all b.s!
Marriage is a joke to the world! It has nothing to do with income or finance -it never has! Everyone lives their lives for things, material that the Bible CLEARLY states: will go away. No one is in it for the long haul anymore and if everyone continues to base their lives around E & VH1 & what they're friends and girlfriends are experiencing. They'll never learn and understand Scripture! It's all mess!
You don't need 10 carats to marry nor do you need media attention or a large church wedding. All you need is a open heart for God and your Spouse.
People place to much emphasis on the nonsense that the world feeds them. i call it the Oprah Syndrome! When people (women) start replacing men/marriage with things.
Love is not enough! It's one thing to get the job but you must also work it! and if you want to advance you must continue to study and research what would make situations better-that's Marriage!
It's crazy! We all are-for the most part-are products of marriage whomever you are, there's marriage in your family from the previous generations. Why are they married 30, 40 even 50 years and no one in the present generation can make 3 years? Well, because they married w/o the option of leaving! The idea was family, love, life together-living together w/o marriage was SHACKING-a strong no, no with my dad (even today)
Looks change,
Love grows, Respect stays-people mature and tolerance becomes understanding. Nonsense dissipates. Don't be foolish God is real and He looks highly on this union when He's in it!!
Marriage Is and always WILL BE relevent
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By: vdog on 11/19/2010 7:19PM
Marrige is a STILL good thing. Just not for someone LOOKING FOR A COME-UP who has their own PERSONAL AGENDA. Marrige is about TWO PEOPLE WORKING TOGETHER FOR THE BETTERMENT OF THE WHOLE. SELFISH PEOPLE NEED NOT APPLY. My ex has found this out the hard way. HAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
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By: Fashionedbygod33 on 11/19/2010 11:40PM
Preach @ nomoxcuses. I love and agree with your post.
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By: George on 11/22/2010 11:05AM
I AGREE WITH YOU NOMOEXCUSES,....PEOPLE TODAY HAVE BECOME JUST WHAT JESUS PREDICTED,...LOVERS OF THEMSELVES, AND PLEASURE...!!!
I WAS MARRIED FOR 27 YRS,...AND I'M ASHAMED TO SAY,BUT WILL ADMIT THAT IT TOOK ME THAT LONG TO SEE THAT MY SPOUSE WAS ONLY ALL ABOUT MONEY...HER MONEY....I MADE DECENT MONEY FROM THE START,UNTIL THE ECONOMY BOTTOMED OUT...THEN SHE KICKED ME TO THE CURB/DIVORCED....SIMPLY BECAUSE SHE ADVANCED IN HER JOB'S CORPORATE LADDER,HAD PEOPLE ASSIGNED TO ANSWER TO HER AS THEIR BOSS....AND THOUGHT THAT SHE COULD THEN BRING THAT ATTITUDE HOME TO SEE IF HER NEW-FOUND AUTHORITY WOULD WORK ON ME....
SHE SOON FOUND OUT ,THAT REAL MEN DON'T EQUATE HOW MUCH MONEY WE BRING IN WITH WHOSE THE HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD...!!!IT HOW GOD HAS ORDERED THE FAMILY STRUCTURE....
1 GOD
2.MAN
3.WOMAN
4.CHILDREN
YET SHE CLAIMS TO BE CHRISTIAN...LOL
ITS ALL A BIG JOKE NOW.....I TELL YOUNG PEOPLE TODAY THAT MARRIAGE ISN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE.....
ITS CALLED A CONTRACT,BUT NOWADAYS, YOUR SPOUSE CAN SIMPLY SAY "IRRECONCILABLE DIFFERENCES"...AND THATS THE END....NO PROOF NON WHATSOEVER...THE COURTS TAK A CONTRACT BETEEN 2 BUSNESESS MORE SERIUOSLY THAN MARRAGE BETWEEN A MAN & WOMAN...WHY DO I SAY THAT?....BECAUSE YOU'LL HAVE TO PROVE TO THE COURTS THAT THE BUSINESS PARTNER BREACHED IT'S CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATIONS IN ORDER TO BE RELEASED FROM FROM AND DISSOLVE THE CONTRACT....IN MARRAGE...YOU DON'T...!!
I WILL NEVER GET MARRIED AGAIN....AND I TELL YOUG FOLKS NOT TO...UNTIL THE COURTS START HAVING A HIGHER TRESH-HOLD OF PROOF FOR DIVORCE....
MR KEEPIN IT REAL......
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By: musiclvr on 11/24/2010 9:09PM
Amen! You got that right! I have always prayed that whenever I met a man, he would love me as much as my father loves my mother; they have been married for 36 yrs now and although they are going through a rough time financially, they still love each other and haven't given up their faith in God. I want that too! Marriage is and always will be important.
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By: eeduj1001 on 11/19/2010 6:38PM
How can marriage be obsolete when homosexual are clamoring to use it to sanctify a perverted sex act?
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By: nomoxcuses on 11/19/2010 7:58PM
I love it-great observation!
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By: wickedmercedez on 11/19/2010 8:45PM
what does sex have do with this topic? all kinds of people have sex in the ways that make it pleasurable for them and how people are doing it has nothing to do with wanting to get married. last time i checked you dont have to be married to have sex. why dont you stop worrying about what people are doring in their own bedroom behind closed doors and worry and whats going on in yours or lack their of.
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By: levelsone on 11/20/2010 8:04AM
Marriage is certainly not obsolete but money is very important to it functioning well. My elderly relatives used to say, "when there's no money, love goes out the window". I laughed back then but after I married, I can see what they were talking about. To me, enough money helps things keep running smoothly. When I married, I loved my bride and still love very much but I must admit I married for better, not worse.
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By: Dark Gable on 11/20/2010 4:27PM
The man usually gets burned when things go South? Thank you Captain obvious! What man in his right mind would sighn legal documents agreeing to pay a woman if things don't work out? Please! Why pay for what you can get for free?
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